718

Van Lith : 718! Pengen cerita banyak tapi badan gue remuk perlahan namun pasti.
yang jelas having fun banget pas di Muntilan kemaren bareng Nadine, Priska, Abraham sama Marcell :D
anddddddd yes sureeeeee!!!!! punya kenalan baru, ketemu temen lama dllll. kakak kelas yang orangnya friendly semua llagi
ada Deddy, Kak Megan, Kak Tito, Kak VP, yah udahlah yaaa ampun, tungguin gua disana ya kak ;))

Pulang ke Jakarta masih kerasa lari di lapangan rumput VL kemaren, sedih deh badan gue sakit semua.
Sampe di Jakarta bukannya seneng malah ketemu hal-hal yang superbbbbbbbbbb nyebelin pol.
uwiisss lah mas sekarep mu wae. nyerah aku karo koe. nek kemaren tuh ngomongnya bedo karo sekarang.
ya besok ra mlebu ya karna koe. bener aku emang musti belajar, yaa mbelajar pisah sama koe. :(

And last, entah mengapa hal ini terlintas di kepala ku..
I WANTED TO BE A PILOT!
and someday, there will be...

Capt. Frederica Dinda Ratnaningtyas

how cool dudes!!

Hey, Tyas =D

hai, namaku tyas.
aku seorang remaja yg sudah hampir menginjak usia 15 tahun. sama seperti yang lainnya, aku mengalami masa kelabilan. masa pencarian jati diri, katanya. yang katanya juga, masa ini adalah masa yang paling berat, ya  aku setuju dalam hal itu. masa dimana suatu kali kamu harus bersikap dewasa bukan seperti anak kecil lagi. masa dimana kamu harus memilih jalan hidup kamu sendiri, bukan bergantung pada teman, pacar atau bahkan orang tuamu.

di masa ini, banyak orang yang keluar masuk kehidupanku. jangka waktunya pun berbeda-beda, sifat maupun sikapnya. disini aku harus memilah. pilih yang benar dan baik, tentunya. tapi terkadang sulit untukku memilih, karena ada beberapa bagian hatiku tertinggal dalam mereka, mereka yang sudah keluar dari hidupku,maupun mereka yang masih tetap tinggal. ya mereka adalah kehidupanku.

sayangnya, aku bukanlah Tuhan yang bisa menjadi seseorang yang sempurna. aku bukanlah dukun yang mempunyai segala cara untuk mendapatkan apa yang dia mau. dan aku juga bukan paranormal yang bisa membaca pikiran orang lain dengan mudahnya. Aku tidak tau apa-apa. sudah ku bilang, aku hanyalah remaja yang hampir menginjakkan kaki di angka 15 dan ini kehidupanku. jujur aku lelah, aku lelah dengan semua ketidakpastian dan kemunafikan yang ada dalam kehidupanku ini. mereka semua br*ngsek. jangan pernah menganggap aku ada lagi. urusi sendiri duniamu , jangan pernah masuk kehidupanku lagi. bersenang-senanglah dengan wanita di luar sana, bersenang-senanglah dengan dunia mu sendiri, bersenang-senanglah dengan mereka yang masih mencintai mu diluar sana.
aku benci kalian semua. kalian selalu datang dan pergi.
datang disaat aku tidak membutuhkan kalian dan pergi saat aku membutuhkan kalian. ya kalian semua munafik. aku benci dengan hal yang bernama cinta.

cinta, yang katanya itu adalah hal yang mempertemukan semua komponen dalam kehidupan. cinta itu semu.
cintaku hanya satu, bukan untukmu! tapi untuk Tuhanku. karena kamu, kamu hanya mempermainkan kehidupanku. memangnya siapa kamu? berani beraninya mempermainkan semua skenario yang telah dibuatNya untukku. tidak pantas. seharusnya kamu malu. Jangan datang jika kamu datang hanya untuk mempermainkannya, aku tidak butuh kamu.

ya benar ini kehidupan ku.
bukan aku yang mengatur,
bukan juga teman atau sahabatku,
bukan pacarku,
dan bahkan bukan keluargaku,
tapi Tuhanku.
aku begini karenaNya, bukan karena kalian.

" If somebody is dumb enough to walk away and leave you, then you must be smart enough to let them go" HA 

realizzzzzzzzz.e.d.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
i learn so much today. about things, life, and love.
hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

at least, thank you so much to Ms. Lidia and my one and only, Mr. Jes for listening all my "blahblahblah" this morning. Itu berarti banget buat saya Mr. Jes. Priceless and then realized U replied my "blahblahblah" suddenly. asli beneran kayak mimpi taugak :-)

udah gak bakalan ada lagi tuh, nyesel-nyesel, galau-galau, sedih-sedih(aihsadissss :p)

Penting banget gitu?

Gue bego. bego banget. bego sebego begonya orang bego. begoan gua (?)
gue baru nyadar gue punya segalanya.

i had a little amazing family, yang selalu support sama apa yang gue mimpi-mimpikan selama ini.
especially, punya dek Astrid yang gak pernah buat gue bosen walaupun dirumah cuma berdua doang tapi pasti ada aja.
punya kakak yang super cuek but care nya yang gak ketolongan.
punya bokap&nyokap yang emang gak selalu bisa sejalan sama apa yang ada dipikiran gue.

gue punya temen (beneran)gue. selalu ada buat gue. at least gak muluk-muluk amat kok,
mereka bisa ngertiin gue.
dan temen-temen xniters, yang selalu buat hidup gue lebih berwarna dengan adanya mereka di hidup gue(?)

Gue punya kehidupan yang udah diatur sedemikian rupa indahnya sama Tuhan Yesus.
It's my fantasy.
Dia terlalu baik sama gue sampe kasih semua itu buat gue.
Gue bangga punya semua ini.

gue bangga sama semua masalah yang gue hadapin.
entah tentang temen, keluarga bahkan sama pacar gue sendiri pun.
gue bersyukur sama semua itu.

karena gue punya Dia, gue bisa curhat kapan pun dimana pun,
sama Sang Sutradara, Tuhan Yesus.
karena disini gue cuma pemeran yang udah diatur sama dalang yang super luar biasaaaaa.
gue gak tau awalnya, klimaksnya maupun endingnya.
jalanin aja yang udah di depan mata lo. syukuri semua yang udah dikasih.

dan yang penting jangan pernah kepikiran "what happen on the next scenario?", j a n g a n itu surprise tau.
just let them flow!

Karena cuma satu yang gue percaya kalo :
"Rencana Tuhan selalu indah pada waktunya"

jadi tugas lo cuma tinggal nunggu waktu yang tepat aja, jalanin yang ada sekarang, syukurin.
udah kok,cuma as simple as that gituu. gak susah kan? :-D

Titanium

You shout it out
But I can't hear a word you say
I'm talking loud not saying much
I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet
You shoot me down, but I get up

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium

Cut me down
But it's you who have further to fall
Ghost town, haunted love
Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones
I'm talking loud not saying much

Stone-hard, machine gun
Firing at the ones who run
Stone-hard, those bulletproof glass

Happy Birthday!

"Happy Birthday to you.. happy birthday to you.. happy birthday, happy birthday, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEX!!!"

failed late night call kalo gak salah itu masih tanggal delapan belas pukul 23:50 menjelang sembilan belas tapi karena yang bersangkutan lagi sakit, jadi tidurnya gak boleh malem-malem.  

Late night call diubah jadi goodmorning call. Its 7.30mayb. 

"siapa yaa yang gak diucapin happy anniv sama pacarnya kemaren?" :p

and yes i did buat dia bete seminggu kemaren.

 bayangin, gue dapet sms :

"Besok aku masih gak masuk din" received 17 / 01 / 2013 16:02:29

"Oh" sent 17 / 01 / 2013 16:10:23

"Aku masih sakit din" received 17 / 01 / 2013 16:10:11

"bodo" sent 17 / 01 / 2013 16:15:02

no replied anymore.

"Kmrn ketiduran lg di jalan. Aku masuk senin" received 18/01/2013 10:05:35

"Td ada yg seru gk di sklh din?" received 18/01/2013 16:19:26

" ya"  sent 20:40:28

"pulsaku udh mau abis nih din :((" received 18/01/2013 20:41"24

"oh" sent 21:00:05

"happy 8th monthversary...................blahblahblah" received 18/01/2013 22:20:57

no replied anymore

dan yang lainnya..

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

so, kasian yang lagi sakit, yang lagi ulang tahun malah harus tes cc. sian deh

btw, i don't gives something special for him,i just gives him around 20 pieces of Post It. no, u don't know what does it mean ;)) + http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7b_QeWtZz0

we will see soon on Monday!

________________________________________________________

11:15 PM 19/02/2013 --> Movie time as usual. Hari ini jadwalnya : People Like Us & Pitch Perfect.

Today's Lesson : 

Six Rules 

Number one : 

If you like something because you thing other people are gonna like it, it's a sure bet no one will

Number two :

Most door in the world are closed, so if you find one that you want to get into, you damn well better have an interesting knock. And if you knock like a drum, you'll be fine

Number three :

Everything that you think is important, isn't. And everything that you think is unimportant is

Number four :

Don't shit when you eat.

Number five :

Lean into it. It means that the outcome doesn't matter. What matters is that you're there for it. Whatever "it:" is good or bad

Number six :

A personal favorite. Never sleep with someone who has more problems than you.  

" I hope you never have to know what its like to love someone and then find out you are not enough for them" 

i can't ever through all of it, when that quote always follow me wherever i go. so what should i do. s i a l

Goodnight folks )":

Jesus Blessed :

"...Laporan Pertanggungjawaban OSIS Periode  2012/2013 telah diterima dengan catatan"

YEY!! Ahkirnya LPJ kelar bro,setelah tiga hari terahkir ini setiap istirahat+jam pelajaran sampe jam 3 nongkrong situ mulu berempat sama ur,ses,tas (abis pw njir).. =D

Tinggal ngumpulin bukti berkas-berkas buat ngelengkapin LPJ huh :(
ditunggu sampe awal Februari sih jadi minggu ini masih bisa tidur siang lah gue yaaaaa

10 kandidat OSIS kelar, tinggal fokus buat tanggal 25 tes Van Lith :((
Tanggal 25 Januari gak bisa ikut pelantikan deh gueeee.


btw, tanggal 18 ya? cie gue. 

ya semoga wishes natalnya bisa terkabul yaa(:

dessim

gloomy monday : sucks.

I forgot who said this : "You're not really a couple until you can enjoy each other's company in silence"

That thought just scares me somehow.

and realized ini baru 1 hari with "this silence situation" since i hang up the phone angrily on last Sunday morning. and now, i'm so damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn fucccckkiinggg seriously missedddd you.

"missing someone is a part of loving them, if you're never apart, you'll never really know how your love is" -Helen Fielding

guten nacht!

There's a boy I know.He's the one I dream of. Look into my eyes
Takes me to the clouds above. Oh I lose control.. Can't seem to get enough
When I wake from dreaming. Tell me.. is it really l o v e ?

How will i know?

If he really loves me?I say a prayer with every heartbeat
I fall in love whenever we meet, I'm asking you, cause you know about this things.
How will i know if he's thinking of me? I try to phone but I'm too shy, can't speak.
Is all bitter-sweet.


"when i look into your eyes its like watching the night sky or a beautiful sunrise"
"..cause even the stars, they burn. some even fall to the earth. we've got a lot to learn. God knows we're worth it.."
Well i won't give up on us. Even if the skies get rough. I'm giving you all my love. 
- I won't give up

Nobody said it was easy. It's such a shame for us to pa. No one ever said it would be this hard. Just take me back to the start.

Are you a man who loves,cherishes and cares for me?Or are you a guard in a prison of maximum security?Do we stay all the time, cause you want me all to yourself ?Or am I locked away out of fear that I'll find someone else? Oh you gotta be ashamed of yourself. What the hell do you think you're doing? Loving me so wrong. All I do is try to show you that you're my one and only guy. No matter who come along.

oh yeah for sure! I'm getting frustrated. everything is gonna ruined my day. this is sucks. UN? Friends? Alex? sucks both of you!

it's harder than ever. 

you sucks. yeah you, yes you over there,you, YOU!

scks. sht. :-D

7 January 2013

Sure, akan banyak banget yang bikin makan hati, like his insensitivity.
Tapi setelah gue pikir-pikir, his insensitivity itu cuma karena dia emang nggak ngerti how to treat a woman. We should be learning each other.
 It's impossible for us to find a perfect spouse if we model him/her
 ...toward someone, atau toward our own sets of criteria.
The world doesn't work that way. We're not God yang bisa bikin orang sempurna, sesuai dengan apa yang kita mau.
But we can try to find someone that just works. That when you and that someone are together, you both just work.
Despite all the hiccups and each other's shortcomings, imperfection, and flaws.
Banyak dari dia yang mau gue ubah, sama seperti banyak dari gue yang pasti dia mau ubah.
 Countless. Banyak banget.
Tapi terus, mau nunggu sampe bisa mengubah each other dulu according to our ideal mindset, baru bisa nerima? enggak kan?
 Terus, kalo emang kami berdua berubah sesuai dengan yang diinginkan masing-masing?
 are we still the same person we both fall in love with?

So you know why you get the impression from here that he is somewhat perfect?

Because to me, he just works.
He and I work, despite our flaws and fights and all that.

 So, stop trying to find the perfect spouse according to your own ideal.

 Just find  someone who just works with you. That's all that matters. Relationship is work. Jadi kalo udah ketemu yang sayang sama lo, lo sayang sama dia, both of you can work things out together, and it feels right(not perfect)... ya udah :))

Happy New Year\m/

First plan : will going to church at 8pm then we will join jakarta car free night.

H : messed up. its rainy. daddy won't join the event, he worrying 'bout the traffic jam&he just want to spent this new year only a-t-h-o-m-e at the roof,actually-_-

8pm : go to church(gloomy)
9.30pm : finished. join bazaar&a little concert at church. uhm,so b o r i n g (rainy)
9.55pm : almost reached home. then i've got a message "yaudah. selamat bersenang2 sama dandy" its ruined my feeling. asdfghjuikwyetbdsk
10pm : reached home. change my clothes, call that whom message me,i mean it's my jerk.

10.15pm : we had late dinner with seafood menu yey. but i'm so sleepy so after that go to bed-_-damn it!

10.15pm-11.45pm : callin'. we talk, we argue, we fight, we just keep silent, we shout, we give up, u too jealousy. yes, i hate this situation.
00 : HAPPY NEW YEAR
1am-2am : "thanks for everything"
2am-3am : i'd sent a voice note to Debby via Line. and this really meaningful. i'll never forget. ever. we'd flashback, we'd cry, we'd laugh, we'd share. anything. i loved us.
3am : sleeping time
11.30am : waking up lately. so thanks 2012.

i'll never forget 2012. too sweet to forget, too hard arrange the lost pieces.
so 2013, it's my turn. here i am.